The Gift of Honest Psalms for Our Broken Lives

I’ve decided to ask a few people to write occasional articles for me to use at Borrowed Light. Today’s guest post comes from Brian Phillips. Brian lives in Granada, Spain with his wife and three kids. You can find him at www.briankassie.com or www.twitter.com/BrianPhillips31

Zack Eswine’s, Sensing Jesus, has been a blessing to me in a strange way. Although geared twoards pastors (which I am not), Eswine’s story and pastoral kindness are exactly the words I’ve needed to hear lately.

My family and I live overseas and we’re here to share the love of Jesus with people. Recently, we visited America to celebrate the wedding of my wife’s sister. While there many difficult things happened—the worst being the death of our unborn baby in miscarriage. We came back to Spain, where we live, feeling torn and empty. We’ve been imperfectly, but earnestly, turning to God our Father for help, healing, and comfort. Personally, in addition to grief, I’ve been fighting some troubling anxiety and racing thoughts in the last several weeks.

So, I recently cracked open Sensing Jesus, a Christmas present, which I expected to coach me into more apt ministry leadership and spiritual depth. Maybe it will do that; I still have the second half of the book to finish. But so far it’s simply healing my soul.

The greatest comfort for me has been in Eswine’s chapter entitled, Fix-It-All. Here he confronts our tendency to try to fix anything. In this chapter there is a section on psalm making. Here he uses David’s example to show how we can use the Psalms to turn to God in prayer, rather than our fleshly efforts “when the going gets tough and unfixable” (p. 111).

Here are the Psalms Eswine shares, followed by a little bit of personal commentary from me.

Deliver me from my enemies, O my God;

Protect me from those who rise up against me. . . .

Each evening they come back,

Howling like dogs

And prowling about the city. . . .

But I will sing of your strength;

I will sing aloud of your steadfast love in the morning.

For you have been to me a fortress,

And a refuge in the day of my distress. (Ps. 59:1, 6, 14, 16)

As anxiety and uncontrolled nightmares taunted me, I felt under attack and powerless. Some nights, I could only fall asleep by whispering, “Jesus, me near me,” over and over and over. And he was. Hope has been new each morning. Even when the things I could count on or control crumbled and proved unfixable, God stayed with me.

Have mercy on me, O God,

According to your steadfast love;

According to your abundant mercy

Blot out my transgressions.

Wash me thoroughly from my iniquity

And cleanse me from my sin! (Ps. 51:1-2)

I know, as a Christian, that Jesus has taken all my punishment forever. There is none left for me. My wife and I didn’t lose this baby because God wanted to slap our wrists for a sin. But as the weeks went by and the wounds weren’t as raw, I began to ask God to show me where I wasn’t trusting him, where I was trying to be my own savior and god – and he shone the light on my anxiety and worry. Some of this is a natural physiological response to the unbelievable shock and stress from our trip, but some of it (I can now admit) was me, trusting in my own power, bucking against my inability to control and fix my broken life.

O Lord, all my longing is before you;

My sighing is not hidden from you.

My heart throbs; my strength fails me,

And the light of my eyes—it has also gone from me. . . .

But I am like a deaf man; I do not hear,

Like a mute man who does not open his mouth. . . .

But for you, O Lord, do I wait;

It is you, O Lord my God, who will answer. (Ps. 38:9-10, 13, 15)

This pain doesn’t have to end in my lifetime. We won’t ‘get over’ all the things that happened during those three weeks in America, as if that were a healthy goal anyway. But, the fear and the loneliness can go; God can take the numbness and the heightened stress with him.

We are children whose loving father knows all their fears and wounds, and he stays with us. He doesn’t just fix the mess as quickly or the way we might ask him to. Instead, he stays with us and slowly-- morning by morning-- he shares with us his peace and rest.

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You can read my review of Sensing Jesus here, and purchase it here.

When You Feel Abandoned by God

It might seem strange counsel but I believe people that are often discouraged and prone to negative thinking need to hear things like this:

God has not abandoned any of us any more than he abandoned Job. He never abandons anyone on whom he has set his love; nor does Christ, the good shepherd, ever lose track of his sheep. It is as false as it is irreverent to accuse God of forgetting, or overlooking, or losing interest in, the state and needs of his own people. If you have been resigning yourself to the thought that God has left you high and dry, seek grace to be ashamed of yourself. Such unbelieving pessimism deeply dishonors our great God and Savior. (J.I. Packer, Knowing God, 88-89)

Doesn’t it feel like we’ve been abandoned at times, though? Doesn’t it feel as if we can pray Psalm 22: “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me”?

Packer himself likely had times of feeling “left high and dry”. As he recalls in his latest work, Weakness is the Way, Packer was a “solitary and rather somber child”. He “had to wear at school, for ten years, a black aluminum patch covering a hole in [his] head…and hence was unable to play outdoor games.” This, Packer says, left him “feeling out of most of what mattered”. He likely felt Psalm 22;

Forsaken.

Groaning.

Lonely.

Silent.

Scorned.

Mocked.

Weak…

Now to really feel Psalm 22 we have to feel it in its entirety. And that is what the above Packer quote is referencing. It’s right—and in fact quite like Christ—to express Psalm 22:1. But if you leave it there—without embracing the redemption of Psalm 22—you are accusing God of being less than He is.

Though we are the afflicted and we feel that in our bones, at the same time faith beckons us to cry out, “The afflicted shall eat and be satisfied.” Yes, this is true. I know it to be true because Jesus has fulfilled Psalm 22.

And because of this I know that the Great Shepherd will never abandon his sheep…including me. Even if I have engaged in the “unbelieving pessimism” that “deeply dishonors our great God and Savior”.

Jesus is just that great.

Jews Didn’t Have Coffee Mugs

Okay I cannot prove that the ancient Hebrews did not have coffee mugs. But I do know that if they did they would not put Bible verses on them the same way that we do.

If I paint Philippians 4:13 in eye black and go out and play a tremendous game of church league softball, you know the statement that I’m making. I’m saying “I can do all things [like kick your tail in softball] through him who strengthens me.” End quote.

That is not the case with the way that the New Testament writers would quote the Old Testament. When Jesus says from the Cross, “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me” He is reciting a Psalm and calling to mind that entire Psalm. In the same way when Paul quotes Habakkuk 2:4 and says, “the righteous shall live by faith” he is thinking of the entire argument of Habakkuk.

This should revolutionize the way that we study our Bibles. When you read something in the New Testament (or even in the Old Testament) that has an allusion to a prior passage these guys aren’t just proof texting; they are proof-storying. They are thinking of the entire context of the passage that they are quoting.

What this means for Bible study (and for sermon prep for us preachers) is that when we discover a passage that has an earlier allusion we had better go back and pick up the entire argument of the passage cited. We do that because this is what the inspired author (say Paul) is doing when he is quoting it. He’s not just reminding us of that sweet passage on our coffee mug, he’s telling us a story.

Example:

The best example of this is probably Jesus’ use of Psalm 22 from the cross. Psalm 22 was a lament for the innocent sufferer. It perfectly fits Jesus’ situation. When He cries out “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?” He is thinking of the entire Psalm. A Psalm which actually points to the vindication of the sufferer.

Does this mean that Jesus was not forsaken by the Father? Not necessarily. Or does this mean that Jesus does not feel the full weight of an innocent one enduring suffering? Absolutely not. If anyone could rightly cry out Psalm 22 it is Jesus. And he feels the full weight of every sentence. But we should remember that it’s not only the cry of dereliction (v1) that Jesus feels, but also the notes of hope that resound throughout the passage.

Jesus will be vindicated. He knows this. While he might feel abandoned—and the full weight of abandonment—He is also trusting in the God who vindicates the innocent. He knows the end of the story.

When he cries out Psalm 22:1 he isn’t doing that because he remembered that verse in AWANA and feels like that verse fits. Nor is Matthew putting it on his lips because he thinks it fulfills verse 1 of Psalm 22. Jesus is crying Psalm 22:1 (and Matthew frames his 27th chapter around that Psalm) because he is telling the story of the entire Psalm.

Lesson:

When you see a verse quoted don’t assume that they quoted verses the same way that we do. Consider the entire context of the Old Testament passage that is quoted. And pack all of that into the one verse that they are quoting. When someone that lived in the age of Jesus quoted a verse they were thinking of the entire passage and it’s argument. We should do the same.

Review of The Psalter Reclaimed

My two-year-old daughter loves  spaghetti. She will pound down an entire plate of the stuff. That is, if we cut the noodles up for her. It’s not that she’s too young to eat the noodles without choking--she’s got the slurping action mastered. But if all she has to deal with are really long noodles she will exhaust herself before she finishes her plate. So we cut the noodles up and she tears into them.

Some books are like chopping up spaghetti for a two-year-old. They are really good but might be a little exhausting for the average reader. It’s not that you’ll choke on it and not be able to understand it, it’s just that you might get so exhausted that you don’t get the full benefit of the book. More experienced readers need to read these types of books and know how to “chop them up” for others to enjoy. The Psalter Reclaimed is one of those books.

Gordon Wenham is a well-respected Old Testament scholar. What we have in The Psalter reclaimed is a collection of various lectures that Wenham gave from 1997-2010. Wenham looks at reading the Psalms canonically as well as messianically. There are also more practical chapters such as his chapter on praying the Psalms. Wenham also doesn’t shy away from the difficult imprecatory Psalms, devoting an entire chapter to thinking about how we ought to read them and use them in our day. Though tipping it’s hat to it’s more scholarly audience, the blurb on the back of the book summarizes it nicely:

[The Psalter Reclaimed] provides hermeneutical guidelines for interpreting the book—making accessible to us the transforming messages of the Psalms.

You can tell from the use of the phrase “hermeneutical guidelines” that the ‘us’ is probably a reference to more theologically experienced readers. Most of the chapters reflect the audiences in which they were given; namely, scholars and divinity students. It is not surprising then that a reader would need to be vaguely familiar with Old Testament scholarship.

Yet, this book does not read like a dry seminary lecture. It is a passionate plea for churches to recover the Psalms and use them for their original intent, as prayers to God. For that reason it is a book that needs to be read by everyone. Either chopped up by a seasoned reader or swallowed whole.

I should mention as well that Wenham’s treatment of the imprecatory Psalms is very helpful. For me that section would be worth the cost of the book. There are many gems throughout this book that the church needs to hear.

You can buy your copy here.

Thereness

Psalm 105:4 says, “Seek the LORD and his strength; seek his presence continually!”  I was trying to chew on that last phrase for a little while today.  I thought about how it relates to God’s omnipresence.  How do I seek his presence?  It’s not like there is ever a spot where He is not and that Psalm 105 is telling me that I need to play hide and seek and find my Lord behind a bush somewhere.  No, I’m not to seek knowledge of His omnipresence. 

This text is telling me to seek His good presence.  His favor.  His countenance.  It’s telling me to be like my children as they demand my presence.  “Daddy, Daddy, Daddy!  Look!  Look!  Do you like my book I made?”

My son, Isaiah, is in a drawing and cutting things out of a notebook phase.  He also found our stapler the other day and is in the business of “makin’ books”.  He’ll staple together a few pages, write a couple of the words that he knows how to spell, and then squiggly lines for the rest.  But the book isn’t complete until daddy “reads” it.  He is seeking my presence, my approval, my thereness. 

That is what Psalm 105:4 is calling us to do continually.  Psalm 105 is calling us to tug on the Lord’s robe and say, “hey daddy, dad, daddy, dad, hey dad!  Do you like my drawing?”  Such a heart is precious.  It refuses to be satisfied until the object of its affection is present in complete thereness.  That snowflake that you cut out isn’t complete in its awesomeness until its also enjoyed by daddy. 

Christ makes the presence of the LORD our delight.  Though he is mighty beyond description and “no creature is hidden from his sight, but all are naked and exposed to the eyes to whom we must give account”, even still because of Christ we are able to “with confidence draw near to the throne of grace”.  His thereness is no longer a terror, it’s a joy. 

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Of course there is also the other side to this that as we continually seek the presence of the LORD we become less concerned about our awesome snowflakes and more concerned with joining daddy in what He is doing.  But I needed to really meditate on this side of presence of the Lord today. 

Jesus Loves Our Space Invaders

I have a coffee mug (more a Mountain Dew mug since I’m not yet man enough to drink coffee) sitting on my desk.  It’s very special to me because of the artwork on it.  It has a heart, the letter I, something that looks like a dinosaur or maybe Vermont, I think some space invaders, a purple blob and an equals sign. 

I think it’s supposed to say “I love you daddy”.  But instead I think it says purple blob equals deformed dinosaur, I heart space invaders.  I’m confident the artwork on this will never be featured in the Louvre.  Let’s be honest the artwork is terrible. 

You know my response when I was handed this coffee mug, don’t you?

I didn’t say, “Son, this work that you’ve done here is quite ridiculous.  What is that purple blob?  Is that supposed to be a dinosaur?  Because it doesn’t look like one.  Is this some sort of sorry excuse for abstract art?  Do you really expect me to put this on my desk and use this so that people can actually see it?  You really ought to know better than trying art.  You are four years old.  And you have clearly shown from this little artistic endeavor that art is not your forte.  Now go to your room and give me something that is actually of respectable quality for my birthday.  I’m ashamed to call you my son.”

Yeah, that hurt to even type.  It’s ridiculous to think that even the worst of dads would respond in such a way. 

Then why do we think God views His children differently? 

Because He is holy?  Because His standards are much higher than ours?  Because He cannot look upon sin, and everything we do is tainted with sin and our righteous deeds are like filthy rags? 

And so somehow those truths make God a worse dad than I am?  Nah, I don’t think so.  I agree with Kevin DeYoung when he says,

…for those who have been made right with God by grace alone through faith alone and therefore have been adopted into God’s family, many of our righteous deeds are not only not filthy in God’s eyes, they are exceedingly sweet, precious, and pleasing to him.  (DeYoung, The Hole in our Holiness, 70)

I don’t expect my four year old to create for me a masterpiece.  But I know that every little stroke of that wobbly paintbrush was out of love for his daddy.  And so I love my deformed dinosaur and my space invaders.  When Isaiah handed me this mug, I did what every decent adult does when handed artwork of this caliber from a four-year-old.  I treasured it.  I put it on display. I found that which was really good in it, I highlighted it, and I showered him with thanks and appreciation. 

“As a father shows compassion to his children, so the LORD shows compassion to those who fear him.  For he knows our frame; he remembers that we are dust.” 

Just as a very flawed earthly father knows to show compassion to his little boy, so our perfect Father knows our frame.  Isn’t it possible that the Lord takes our wobbly efforts and pins them on his celestial refrigerator?  How wonderful it is that though we are but dust the Lord takes great delight in our not yet fully redeemed, still flawed, and still tainted expressions of love! 

Let’s go lovingly paint the best deformed dinosaurs that we know how. 

The Old Man I Want To Be

One generation shall commend your works to another, and shall declare your mighty acts.  -Psalm 145:4

“Damn weather’s going to kill us all!”  

I’m guessing the old crank was just trying to find a way to connect with the young lady behind the counter, but as these words filled my ear lobes I couldn’t help but envision what 15 minutes on a porch with this old chap would entail. 

I imagine it’d be filled with a few shots at either Obama or those stubborn republicans, or maybe a steady dose of vitriol aimed at both.  He’d continue to complain about the weather.  He’d tell me about the good ol’ days and we’d both dream of being able to buy 15 cent cheeseburgers or a tank of gas without sacrificing our children’s college fund.  He’d curse the sky and damn the heat into the fiery abyss and we’d bond on our common lot of futility in a fallen world.  Then I’d wallow off his porch, stoop into my humble car, and drive off in sorrow lamenting everything. 

I don’t want to be that guy.

Not that he doesn’t have a partial truth cornered.  He does.  I’m sure that 15 cent cheeseburgers are better than the $1.00 mystery meat we call McDonalds.  It is hot.  There is an element of futility and brokenness to our world.  He’s right, things aren’t as they ought to be. 

But he’s not totally right.  All of life isn’t lived in a valley. 

“Great is the Lord, and greatly to be praised, and his greatness is unsearchable”.  I want to spend 15 minutes (or much longer) on a porch with the guy that says that. 

Partially because he’s the same guy that at one point said, “darkness is my only companion”.  I want to learn how he stares reality in the face, nods his head in agreement with the old moaner, and then opens his lip and infuses every one of those complaints with abounding grace.  This guy gets the whole story.  He goes through the valley but knows that isn’t the whole story. 

The old grumbler only gets the Fall right.  But he has no room for the gospel.  No room for declaring the excellencies of Christ or to commend the works of the Lord to another generation.  I don’t want to be that old man. 

I want to be the old man that can say at one point “darkness is my only companion” but out of the same overflowing heart also say, “Great is the Lord, and greatly to be praised, and his greatness is unsearchable”. 

When I find myself in the position of an old man sitting on a porch with an opportunity to declare wonder I don’t want to botch it and say “damn weather’s gonna kill us all”.  I want be able to say “my goodness it’s hot”, and then tell the next generation about a time when I was 30 and it was really hot and we were in the middle of a drought and we gathered at the church for our usual Sunday morning service.  Then I’ll tell how we started the service by praying for rain only to be interrupted by a thundercloud and a downpour of rain.  And I’ll share how I closed off my sermon a little early and we all without provocation gathered around the window and listened to the Lord preach a sermon on His provision in the form of rain on a parched land.

Yeah.  I want to be that old man.  But I know today that I won’t be that old man unless I have my eyes open in my thirties.  If I’m a curmudgeon now my face is sure to grow into one of those perpetual frowns by the time I’m 70.  I’d rather spend my days meditating on “glorious splendor of the Lord’s majesty” and “on His wondrous works”, then when I’m 70 I’ll have plenty to rejoice in with those young whippersnappers. 

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Note: Because that old guy in the photo looks a decent amount like one of my grandfather’s I hold out hope that I can sport such an amazing toothless grin when I’m his age. 

Santa-god and Psalm 44

He's making a list,And checking it twice;Gonna find out Who's naughty and nice.

Good little boys and girls can be assured that if they are good then Santa Claus will bring them presents.  But the bad little boys and girls had better shape up because Santa Claus is coming to town and these little sprouts are going to have hell to pay.  No toys for these little minions they’ll be getting coals and spankings or at best that nasty fruitcake. 

If Christians are faithful then God will bless them.  He will give them presents like peace, prosperity, and healthy relationships.  When we turn our back on biblical principles this is when we are robbed of peace, prosperity, and our relationships become fractured.  But we can be assured that if we are nice rather than naughty the Lord (who sees us when we are sleeping even) will reward us well. 

You can extend this to a national level and say that when a nation is faithful to the Lord by allowing prayer in schools, keeping 10 Commandments and nativity scenes on the courthouse lawn, and making sure that our money mentions God then we will have prosperity, increased jobs, a better economy, and all the things that our good God-fearing nation would desire.

Now before I make my point it is important that you do not hear what I am not saying.  I think God does ultimately desire peace, prosperity, and healthy relationships, and ultimately I believe those will belong to those that are faithful to Him.  God does bless obedience.  Obedience is a good thing.  But… 

How does the above mentioned Santa-god fit into Psalm 44? 

The logic of Santa-god and Psalm 44

In verses 1-8 the sons of Korah remind the nation of the power of God displayed in their history.  They remind the people that if they are to have victory and salvation it will come through the Lord and not their own efforts.  Verse 8 ends with, “In God we have boasted continually, and we will give thanks to your name forever”. 

For the first eight verses it sounds like Santa-god is standing on pretty solid biblical grounds.  If we were using logic it would look like this:

(A) As he has shown in the past, God blesses those that are faithful
(B) The Sons of Korah are being faithful
(C.) Therefore, the Sons of Korah will experience God’s blessing

But that is not what the equation looks like in Psalm 44:9.  Instead it is this:

(A) As he has shown in the past, God blesses those that are faithful
(B) The Sons of Korah are being faithful
(C.) “But you have rejected us and disgraced us and have not gone out with our armies”. 

Instead of “blessing” the people experience tribulation, distress, persecution, famine, nakedness, danger, and sword.  They are “sold for a trifle”.  They have become a “laughingstock”, their face is “covered with shame” and they have become like “sheep for the slaughter”. 

Perhaps I am simply forgetting the other equation.  Certainly their situation is a result of their unfaithfulness.  This must be their equation:

(A) God punishes iniquity and does not bless those that are unfaithful
(B) Those living in the days of the sons of Korah are not being blessed
(C.) Therefore, the sons of Korah must be unfaithful

The only problem with that “loophole” is that according to Scripture the sons of Korah have not been “false to your covenant”.  They have not turned their hearts away from the Lord.  They have not departed from the ways of the Lord.  They aren’t talking sinless perfection here, they know they aren’t sinless; but they have remained faithful to the covenant.  And yet, “for your sake we are killed all the day long; we are regarded as sheep to be slaughtered”. 

Romans 8 and Psalm 44

It is interesting that Paul quotes Psalm 44 in the midst of Romans 8.  Honestly it seems like a weird (almost self-contradictory) place to quote Psalm 44.  At the end of Romans 8 Paul is asking the question, “Who shall separate us from the love of Christ?”  He then lists all those really bad things like tribulation, danger, sword, etc. and then quotes Psalm 44.  Why?

Paul is looking back to Psalm 44 at the experience of the sons of Korah and instructing us that believers will face mockery and suffering; such is, as Schreiner notes, the “lot of Christians”.  Believers will suffer and it is not because they aren’t being faithful or that they aren’t having enough faith but precisely because God loves them. 

In the midst of Psalm 44 the congregation is invited to join the psalmist in praying for the Lord’s redemption.  Romans 8 is no different.  It is placed there with Psalm 44 to infuse us with hope that in the midst of suffering and difficulty we can take heart that there is no place so low where the love of Christ does not reach the believer.  The suffering that we experience is not necessarily a sign of the Lord’s disfavor but is perhaps a sign of his profound love and grace.

Somehow the pain of Psalm 44 or Romans 8 is not divorced from the depth of God’s love.  This experience is not meant to separate us from the Lord but in actuality the banner that is placed over-top of this suffering is “No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us”. 

Not just conquerors.  More than conquerors.  To conquer it would be to get through something, to achieve victory over it, to slay it.  At the end of “conquering” this suffering would be a statement like, “whew, I am really glad that is over”.  But the text goes further than merely conquering.  It says more than conquerors. 

“More than conquerors” means that somehow God turns horrible things like suffering and death into good.  Those that are “more than a conquerors” would say things like, “that was really difficult and I would not necessarily desire to go through it again, but it has deepened my relationship with Christ, increased my capacity for joy, and brought me into a greater conformity with Christ.” 

The problem with Santa-god  

There are many problems with the Santa-god moralism that wears the mask of concerned Christianity, but I want to quickly note three.  The first and perhaps the worst is that he rips us off by distracting us with fleeting pleasures.  With Santa-god the goal to obedience does not become greater conformity to Christ, greater enjoyment of God as God-belittling sin no longer distracts us from relishing the Lord.  With Santa-god the goal to obedience is a bigger house, cheaper gas for your car, and more gold buried in your backyard.  What a rip off.  God offers eternal pleasure of infinite joy.  I’m not buying this shoddy promise that Santa-god is promising. 

Secondly, if we take this on a national level Santa-god causes lots of fighting.  If Santa-god looks at us as a nation to see if we are being naughty or nice then those darn liberals not letting baby Jesus silently sleep in the courthouse lawn are causing me to be put on that naughty list.  I’ll fight these loser to the death because they are robbing me of the fleeting pleasures that Santa-god is promising us if we would only be good. 

Lastly, Santa-god creates moralism in the midst of brokenness instead of shining a light on the only source of hope.  The message of Santa-god to a suffering sinner is simply, “repent, get up out of the mess, and do better next time”.  He offers moralism as the solution to brokenness.  But not Jesus.  Jesus offer complete redemption.  Jesus whispers to the suffering, “nothing is going to stop me from loving you”.  He comes into the midst of brokenness, changes our hearts, and while he still calls to repentance he also infuses our hearts with hope, love, and grace to accomplish the task He calls us to fulfill. 

Individually and corporately we need Jesus.  We cry out with the sons of Korah, “Rise up; come to our help! Redeem us for the sake of your steadfast love!” But we, as the sons of Korah could only know partially, know that Jesus Christ did “rise up” and he has redeemed us for the sake of His steadfast love!  And we know now that there is nothing that can separate us from His love.  Our crying now is for the not-yet to become the already! 

Bad News Good

“I have some bad news”. 

I have come to loathe those words.  It’s not so much the actual bad news that I disdain as much as the infinitesimal pause before the bomb drops.  In that second, which seems to last a millennium, my mind races to predict what darkness—once hidden in the unknown—will now be birthed into light. 

This time the “bad news” was about our hopes of being able to feel a little more settled.  My wife and I had been given great hope that we would be able to look for a house and live in something we could call “ours” for less money than we are currently throwing away in our tiny apartment. 

As it now appears that hope is to be dashed.  Now we are living on the somber side of Proverbs 13:12.  “Hope deferred makes the heart sick”.  Yes, it does.  It’s not merely the un-desirableness of continuing to feel unsettled that has our hearts sick.  It’s also that we are afraid of what more lives in the darkness of an unknown future.  What else will emerge from the shadows? 

In moments of great turmoil I am afraid that what will emerge are more hellish messengers, casting upon me words of shame.  “What kind of man are you?  You’re thirty years old, and you aren’t providing for your family the way you should!” 

These fiends turn my eyes towards only the happiness of those dancing with our dream.  I only see their smiles as they build another mansion on the outskirts of Eden.  And for a moment my eyes are blinded to the emptiness of living for life outside the Garden.  And in my foolishness I long to set up a tent in their midst. 

Then grace breaks through. 

I remember Psalm 84:11, “No good thing does he withhold from those who walk uprightly”.  I am reminded that the only way that this promise is mine is through the faithfulness and uprightness of Jesus.  But I know that I am assuredly “hidden in Christ”.  So, I know that through Jesus this is true of me.  My loving Father, will withhold no good thing. 

What does that mean for our “bad news”?  Simply, that this dream will be reality when it is actually a good thing.  Even though I believe now that a house would be a good thing, I also know that the sovereign Lord of the universe sees all and knows all.  If this is being “withheld” from us then it must not at this present moment be a good thing.  When it is good it will be ours to enjoy. 

It must be noted that by “good” I know (from Romans 8) that ultimately what is “good” is conformity to Christ.  Therefore, at this present moment having a house would not bring us into greater conformity to Christ.  I do not know what that reason is, but I do know that God is good and will not allow us to settle for lesser joys. 

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Lord, forgive me for moments of infidelity when I rail against your sovereign goodness.  You are the King, I am not.  I know that you are good and that you withhold no good thing from your children.  I know that you are a loving and merciful Father that will not give his children a stone when we ask for bread.  I also know that you are radically committed to my joy.  And I know that you are the fountain of life and in your light do we see light.  You rescue me from drinking putrid waters outside Eden and will not be satisfied until I “drink from the river of your delights”.  Thank you for being more dedicated to our joy than I am.  I would settle for a temporary pleasure—whereas you, stir up my heart to long for the eternal.  You are good. 

If King David Blogged In Our World

King David wakes up from his royal slumber.  The dreary-eyed David checks his email. 

14 new messages. 

After deleting all of the male enhancement products, requests from Nigerian princes, and chain letters about loving Jesus and America Israel he reads this gem:

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Subject: You Suck!

Dearest King David,

I heartily disagree with your theology.  RANT, RANT, RANT, RANT, a few true statements, A COUPLE STABS AT YOUR CHARACTER, bless your heart.

Sincerely,

Joe Troll. 

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Now what happens in our day? 

King David hits reply and plays some serious defense.

Subject: You are in Error!  And I Suck Less than You!

Thanks for reading my blog.  Rather than listen to any positive criticism or truth that may be in what you are saying I am going to ignore this.  Instead of actually applying the gospel to my heart I am instead going to defend myself.  You have attacked my performance and I cannot handle that.  Therefore, I am going to pick your argument apart and display for all the world to see that you sir are an idiot, and I suck much less than you do.  Also NEVER question my theology.  I can’t handle that either.  So please respond with something that I am sure to also not listen to, so that we can talk around each other for all the watching world to see. 

King David after my own heart.

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You know what?  David actually had all sorts of junk a million times worse in his life.  His own son wanted to kill him.  David didn’t blog about it.  David didn’t defend himself.  He pleaded with the Lord:

O LORD, how many are my foes!
        Many are rising against me;
     many are saying of my soul,
        there is no salvation for him in God. Selah
    But you, O LORD, are a shield about me,
        my glory, and the lifter of my head.
     I cried aloud to the LORD,
        and he answered me from his holy hill. Selah
    I lay down and slept;
        I woke again, for the LORD sustained me.
     I will not be afraid of many thousands of people
        who have set themselves against me all around.
    Arise, O LORD!
        Save me, O my God!
    For you strike all my enemies on the cheek;
        you break the teeth of the wicked.
    Salvation belongs to the LORD;
        your blessing be on your people! Selah
(Psalm 3 ESV)

David didn’t hit reply.  He went to sleep and trusted that the LORD would vindicate him.  And of course this is only reflecting the Greater David who was silent when mocked.  Jesus didn’t hit reply, either.  He endured the Cross know that the Father would vindicate him (the resurrection).

I have a ton to learn from David.  Obviously, even more to learn from Jesus.  Because he did speak sometimes.  He defended His gospel against the Pharisees.  He fought heresy.  He tackled demons.  But he also endured persecution.  Sometimes he was silent.  I pray that the LORD gives me the grace to take criticism well.  To be silent when I should and speak when I should. 

More than anything I pray that the gospel goes deep enough into my heart that I can go to sleep instead of feeling like I need to hit “reply”. 

The Protection of God in Tearing Me to Pieces

“But let all who take refuge in you rejoice; let them ever sing for joy, and spread your protection over them, that those who love your name may exult in you.”  (Psalm 5:11)

“Spread your protection over them”

Sure doesn’t seem like that sometimes.  If God is protecting me then why do I still have to endure suffering?  If God is protecting me why do I still get sick?  Why do we go through financial difficulties?  Why do certain things happen in my life that cause heart-breaking anxiety? 

Sometimes I don’t feel protected.  Granted it could be that God is protecting me and I just don’t see it.  I am certain that happens at times. 

But seriously, God seems to have no problem rocking my life every so often.  From all appearances he is not protecting me from suffering.  Rather than spreading protection over me it feels like he is tearing me into pieces. 

I wonder, though, is it possible that maybe those two things aren’t polar opposites.  Is it possible that the activity of God in tearing me to pieces (Hosea 6) is actually the means that he is using to spread his protection over me?

The truth is that I’m too short-sighted to know my real enemies.  Sickness, financial difficulty, and anxiety may be God protecting me from the enemy of self-sufficiency and self-reliance; which are far more deadly than any physical calamity.  What good would it be for me to gain the whole world (protected from all calamity) and yet lose my soul? 

Perhaps the greatest part of God’s protecting ministry is to protect us from our own foolish hearts and soul-damning idolatry.  God is absolutely committed to me.  He has said he will protect me even if that means painfully ripping idols out of my heart and life. 

The Bridge of Grace

O LORD, how many are my foes!
        Many are rising against me;
     many are saying of my soul,
        there is no salvation for him in God. Selah

    But you, O LORD, are a shield about me,
        my glory, and the lifter of my head.
     I cried aloud to the LORD,
        and he answered me from his holy hill. Selah

    I lay down and slept;
        I woke again, for the LORD sustained me.
     I will not be afraid of many thousands of people
        who have set themselves against me all around.

    Arise, O LORD!
        Save me, O my God!
    For you strike all my enemies on the cheek;
        you break the teeth of the wicked.
    Salvation belongs to the LORD;
        your blessing be on your people! Selah
(Psalm 3 ESV)

I love this Psalm.  Here is David broken, hurting, and feeling trapped.  I mean the guys own son is thirsty for his blood.  And to top it all off he hears their taunting, “there is no salvation for him in God”. 

Now that can mean a couple of things.  It could mean that they are saying, “David, you are so wicked there is no hope for you to be found in the Lord; there is no way that God can forgive someone like you.”  Or it could be simply questioning the faithfulness of God.  More than likely it is the first one. 

Have you heard these messengers? 

Perhaps they are saying, “your sins are so bad there is no hope for your soul.  Clean yourself up and then maybe the Lord will find you acceptable”.  Sometimes it cuts deeper.  It’s not just our behavior that is unacceptable, it’s our entire being.  And at times they sound like this, “You are on your own. If you want change you better make it happen yourself. God is sick of having to do it. It’s about time you start carrying your load”.

And every day we hear from messengers saying, “This will save you”. Underneath this idolatry is the message that you had better find refuge in this new (fill in the blank) because God isn’t sufficient to make you acceptable.

In our darker times we believe the lie.  We try something new.  Even holy, churchy, Jesus-sounding things.  This new study will finally fix me.  This new strategy for conquering addiction will finally break the chains.  This new information will transform me.  This new community will finally heal these wounds. 

But notice David…

He had a history with the Lord.  He believed that God was is shield (notice that it isn’t that God gives David a shield.  God IS the shield).  He knew that these messengers were liars, and it did not matter how many or how loud they shouted.  David had firmly experienced and had it settled in his mind (at least on this occasion) that Salvation belongs to the Lord and in nothing else. 

David is only saying what Spurgeon did thousands of years later:

Ah! the bridge of grace will bear your weight, brother. Thousands of big sinners have gone across that bridge, yea, tens of thousands have gone over it. I can hear their trampings now as they traverse the great arches of the bridge of salvation. They come by their thousands, by their myriads; e'er since the day when Christ first entered into His glory, they come, and yet never a stone has sprung in that mighty bridge. Some have been the chief of sinners, and some have come at the very last of their days, but the arch has never yielded beneath their weight. I will go with them trusting to the same support; it will bear me over as it has borne them.

Don’t believe the lie…the bridge of grace will bear your weight!!!!  Salvation belongs to the Lord. 

Agree or Disagree? The Psalms and the Young

“…Not a lot of people know the book of Psalms well at twenty-five.  This is because the book of Psalms resonates with people who have had a lot of experiences.  You have to have quite a lot of different experiences under your belt before you resonate easily with a lot of the things that are said in the book of Psalms: lament, loss, shame, death, triumph, the exaltation of informed and godly God-centered praise, and prophecy anticipating what is still to come.”  If instead you have a  very limited experience, most of these things just sounda bit over the top or a bit extravagant or even alien to you.”  (Carson, The God Who Is There, 86)

What is your experience with the Psalms?  I am looking to hear from people in all age ranges.  Has your appreciate of the Psalms grown over the years?  Are there any under twenty five that would disagree with Carson? 

Talk to me…

Review of The Gift of Psalms

If you have ever dreamed of doing your quiet time with George Costanza or Mac Taylor then the Gift of Psalms is the devotional for you.  Otherwise it’s just plain weird.  I received this book a really long time ago from Thomas Nelson in exchange for a review.  After sitting on my shelf for months I finally pulled it down to finish and review. 

Honestly the devotionals, written by Lori Jones, are pretty solid for devotionals.  Not every Psalm is represented (only 50 of them).  Each devotional is a page long, and typically filled with some background information.  Also the Psalm is presented in NKJV. Some of the devotionals also do a good job of making the Psalm Christ-centered, although some seem to miss it’s Gospel-Centered interpretation.  Each devotional then closes in prayer. 

Here is a sample (one that’s more of a “be like David”, than a “look at Jesus”):

Like David, we must have determination in order to live lives that are devoted to honoring God.  We are constantly bombarded every day with things that dishonor God—prideful attitudes, disrespectful language, selfishness, deceit, and more.  We have to be careful about what we allow our hearts and minds to be exposed to…

The packaging of this book is wonderful.  It’s very appealing and would at least look like a great gift for someone.  But honestly, I’m not sure who I would give this to or recommend it for.  It may be a decent introductory devotional, maybe.  But I just could not get around the reading of the Psalms by celebrities that don’t believe the words they are reading. 

Rating 2 out of 5 Stars

You can buy it for under 15 bucks at Amazon. 

One Reason We Need the Psalms

…to learn to grieve.

Peter Scazzero explains the sad result of ignoring our pain:

Year after year we deny and avoid the difficulties and losses of life, the rejections and frustrations.  People in our churches minimize their failures and disappointments.  The result is that for many today, at least in prosperous North America, there is a widespread inability to face pain.  This has led to an overall feeling of superficiality and a lack of profound compassion.

Our culture trivializes tragedy and loss.  Every night on the news we are given pictures of crimes, wars, famines, murders, and natural disasters.  They are analyzed and reported, but there is no lamenting.

Our national capacity to grieve is almost lost.  We are too busy with trying to keep everything as it is and getting our own way.  When a loss enters our life, we become angry at God and treat it as an alien invasion from outer space.  Is it any wonder that there exists so much depression in our culture? 

(From The Emotionally Healthy Church, by Peter Scazzero, p.161)

What would you say to the Psalmist in Psalm 88?

Imagine that the Psalmist is a dear friend that comes to you with this “poem” that he has written.  It, he says, vividly portrays the way he is feeling.  How do you counsel him?

88:1 O Lord, God of my salvation;
I cry out day and night before you.
2 Let my prayer come before you;
incline your ear to my cry!
3 For my soul is full of troubles,
and my life draws near to Sheol.
4 I am counted among those who go down to the pit;
I am a man who has no strength,
5 like one set loose among the dead,
like the slain that lie in the grave,
like those whom you remember no more,
for they are cut off from your hand.
6 You have put me in the depths of the pit,
in the regions dark and deep.
7 Your wrath lies heavy upon me,
and you overwhelm me with all your waves. Selah
8 You have caused my companions to shun me;
you have made me a horror to them.
I am shut in so that I cannot escape;
9 my eye grows dim through sorrow.
Every day I call upon you, O Lord;
I spread out my hands to you.
10 Do you work wonders for the dead?
Do the departed rise up to praise you? Selah
11 Is your steadfast love declared in the grave,
or your faithfulness in Abaddon?
12 Are your wonders known in the darkness,
or your righteousness in the land of forgetfulness?
13 But I, O Lord, cry to you;
in the morning my prayer comes before you.
14 O Lord, why do you cast my soul away?
Why do you hide your face from me?
15 Afflicted and close to death from my youth up,
I suffer your terrors; I am helpless.
16 Your wrath has swept over me;
your dreadful assaults destroy me.
17 They surround me like a flood all day long;
they close in on me together.
18 You have caused my beloved and my friend to shun me;
my companions have become darkness.

When Prayer Might Be Harmful

“…my soul refuses to be comforted.  When I remember God, I moan; when I meditate, my spirit faints”.  (Psalm 77:2-3)

In this Psalm Asaph appears to be in deep distress.  He hopes to find comfort and rescue in God.  Yet, his mind is met with something different: the “dark” side of God.  Instead of seeing the goodness and mercy of God he is consumed by the holiness and justice of God.  And that, I think, is why his meditating causes his spirit to faint. 

When Asaph comes before the Lord all he can think of is the Lord’s disfavor.  “Will the LORD spurn forever, and never again be favorable?”  Oh, what a terrible thought!  Asaph knows Exodus 34:6 and that God abounds in steadfast love.  But he also knows that this same God will “by no means clear the guilty”, so his heart is torn and his mind is troubled.  Has his guilt forever cast Him out of the Lord’s gracious favor?  

You see Asaph lived on the dark side of Calvary.  He could look back and remember the Lord’s character and his rescue of His people in the past (77:10-20) and this would cause him to look forward to God’s coming rescue--but he still lived on the dark side of Calvary. 

He continued to trust in the God of the covenant that would rescue the penitent, but He could not yet see the beauty and finality of the redeeming work of Christ, so questions lingered.  Am I really penitent?  Will I really receive mercy?  Is He going to come through on His promise? 

I live on the lightened side of Calvary.  I am able to see the beauty and finality of the redeeming work of Christ.  And yet sometimes my mind and heart are dull.  I become like Asaph and I refuse to be comforted.  When I look to God I moan rather than rejoice.  I forget that I am approach the throne of grace and I instead faint in my meditations.  My mind can still live on the dark side of Calvary. 

This is why I think the most dangerous thing for me to do sometimes is to only pray.  Until I am convinced of the gospel and its application to my condition, my prayers will create fainting instead of joy.  My repentance will become, “I’ll try to do better”.  My intercession will be ritual and a guise to gain acceptance.  Everything about my time with God will only serve to further depress me.  Why?

The only way to access is through the shed blood of Jesus Christ.  If I am unconvinced of the goodness of God then I am not approaching Him through the finished work of Jesus.  Because, you cannot really look at the Cross and question the goodness of God; You cannot really consider the power of the resurrection and what it means for us and question the goodness of God; You cannot really believe that Christ has ascended and is pleading on our behalf and question His goodness. 

So I want to meditate on the work of Christ and then plead for rescue.

Does this make any sense…?