Forget This Post

“I need to be made willing to be forgotten.”
–R.Murray McCheyne

This quote has been jarring my heart for the past few days. In the past I read it with a great deal of stupidity. I read it as if it was sort of tongue in cheek. As if McCheyne is saying, “If I really want to be made great…then I need to be made willing to be forgotten”. The way to greatness is to not really pursue it. And so if you want to secretly pursue greatness the way to do it is to pursue humility and in the end you’ll be made great.

Oddly enough that philosophy is probably correct. Scripture is clear that the way to be made great is to become the servant of all. To be exalted by God you don’t pursue exaltation you pursue humility.

But here is where I have been dumb. Those aren’t tongue in cheek statements. The idol of greatness needs to topple not just pursued through godly means. If I’m still pursuing my name being great—even if I’m trying to do it through sneaking in the back door of humility—all I will ever muster is mock humility and self-forgetfulness.

Help From David Murray

As I was praying through what the Lord was doing in my soul I remembered an article that David Murray had written back in June about leaving a legacy. It was a great article encouraging us to not live for a legacy. Looking back I think this article was used by the Lord to pry His sandal into the door of this heart idol of mine.

One of the statements that David made in that post was this: “most of us have ordinary ministries, and our ministries will die with us.” That stings. And not because I want to be useful to the Lord. That stings because I want to be remembered. I want to be a difference maker. Often not for the sake of actually making a difference but so that I can park in the space that says “Difference Maker”.

I read Murray’s article again and another statement floored me. “I’d rather my children know Christ than people know who David Murray is a hundred years from now.” That statement pierced my soul. In my head and in my heart I really do believe that same thing. Or at least I want to. But when reality sets in the truth is that I’m probably more passionate about being remembered as a great dad than actually being one.

David is living the same thing that McCheyne said over 150 years ago, “I need to be made willing to be forgotten”.

Forgotten But Useful

This is not a call to be lazy. It is a call to pursue usefulness and let the Lord decide our legacy. I am learning now that this is not a tongue in cheek promise. As if I faithfully plod along and pursue usefulness that someday he’ll make me a nice legacy. I am learning now that this is a fool’s pursuit. My aim is Christ and being made useful as a servant to Him.

Useful means that he decides the rhythm of my ministry. It means that my chief aim, which is already mine, is to be remembered by God and to make my life ambition to make sure that He is the remembered one and not me. As Zack Eswine reminds us that is a good thing. “Being remembered by him means we no longer fear being forgotten by the world”. (Sensing Jesus, 19)

One of my favorite quotes is now taking on new life, “No man can bear witness to Christ and to himself at the same time. No man can give the impression that he himself is clever and that Christ is mighty to save.” Pointing to Jesus isn’t a backdoor way of robbing glory and making myself an exalted preacher. Pointing to Jesus is the end in itself. Period.

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Lord Jesus, forgive me of foolishness. Forgive me of attempting to rob you of glory. Forgive me for all of the times that I expected You to quote me. I have been a fool. Thank you for grace. Thank you for patience. Thank you for exposing this idol in my heart. I pray as McCheyne did some 150 years, “make me willing to be forgotten”. You will be remembered. And this is my greatest good.

You First

In 1839 Robert Murray McCheyne went on mission to Palestine. In his place at St. Peter’s was the Rev. W.C. Burns. Here is McCheyne’s charge to Burns:

Take heed to thyself. Your own soul is your first and greatest care. You know a sound body alone can work with power; much more a healthy soul. Keep a clear conscience through the blood of the Lamb. Keep up close communion with God. Study likeness to Him in all things. Read the Bible for your own growth first, then for your people. Expound much; it is through the truth that souls are to be sanctified, not through essays upon the truth. Be easy of access apt to teach, and the Lord teach you and bless you in all you do and say.

I think his point of “reading the Bible for your own growth” goes with his point to “expound much”. When we are taking aback by the Word of God that is being used by God to rock our own souls we will hardly have a care to give “essays upon the truth” but we’ll passionately proclaim Truth Himself. 175 years later McCheyne’s advice ought to be heeded by every preacher of the gospel.

Borrowing Light From Who?

This blog is called Borrowed Light due mainly to Robert Murray McCheyne’s response to reading Jonathan Edwards:

"How feeble my spark of Christianity appears beside such a sun! But even his was a borrowed light, and the same source is still open to enlighten me."

The truth behind this quote struck me at the Pastor’s Conference.  I look up to many of the men that spoke at this year’s Pastor’s Conference.  I love the gospel centrality that consumes Matt Chandler.  I love the joyous humility and love for Jesus that CJ Mahaney has.  I love Dr. Moore’s wisdom and heart for gospel-driven adoption.  I love Dr. Mohler’s wisdom and leadership.  This is not to mention all of the amazing things about Danny Akin, Francis Chan, David Platt, Mark Dever, etc. 

But I realized something as I sat listening to and admiring these men: what I love about them is Jesus in them.  It would be ignorant and desperately falling short to admire and follow men in such a way that does not lead me to a deeper worship of Jesus.  At the end of the day the only borrowed light that matters or lasts is that which comes from Jesus.  May I love, admire, and respect my leaders, but do so in such a way that bends my heart to Jesus.

Who is this quote from?

I think I know how it happened but I have conflicting citings. D.A. Carson gives credit to McCheyne, I have it written down as John Owen.

"What a man is on his knees, in secret, before God that he is an no more".

I have an Owen quote that says

"A minister may fill his pews, his communion roll, the mouths of the public; but what that man is on his knees, in secret, before God Almighty, that he is, and no more."

Does anyone know where the McCheyne quote comes from? Carson does not cite it but attributes it to McCheyne. I have it written down as Owen--but also not cited. My guess is that McCheyne rephrased Owen's quote to make it more universal in scope. Anyone know?

Borrowed Light: Today in Blogworld 12/28

With 2008 quickly approaching I am getting prepared for the 2008 McCheyne Reading Plan. Thoughts on the Way will be "hosting" a discussion on what we are reading each day. Also helpful is Ben Edington's McCheyne Reading Calendar website. Extremely helpful on that site is an RSS Feed that you can subscribe to; this will assist in having the readings delivered to your Google Reader daily. (HT: JT)

Timmy Brister also is continuing his "Best of 2007" series. Today we are treated to 20-16.

Erik Raymond, the Irish Calvinist, heard an excellent sermon this morning...from a bird. What an excellent reminder that all creation (in some way) preaches the gospel to us. What was the bird's sermon? It appears that he chose for his text Romans 8:18-22. His main point? Raymond says, "It is as if this bird said, “Whoa, son of Adam! That is far enough! Don’t you come running up here on me with that evil, perverted, and contrary heart of yours! Do you not know that that which gives you life is the cause of death in all of the earth!! Your heart is more deceitful than anything else!!” This is an excellent gospel-centered post that you are encouraged to check out.

Josh Harris has given us Part 5 and 6 to his series on Affluenza.

Name Change

Perhaps you have noticed the new title to this blog. If you were expecting to end up at FBC New London do not freak out--it's still us! However, because our hope is to extend far beyond our local community we have decided to make a change to the blog title. Borrowed Light will be our new blog title. Where does this come from?

If you have ever read the biography of Jonathan Edwards (or other great men of God like Whitefield, Spurgeon, McCheyne, etc.) then hopefully you have experienced the humbling and silencing benefit of comparing your own walk with these "giants". In fact one man that I consider a "giant" in the faith is Robert Murray McCheyne. Apparently, he felt the same humbling experience when reading Edwards. On March 20, 1832 after reading part of the Life of Jonathan Edwards, McCheyne then comments, "How feeble my spark of Christianity appear beside such a sun! But even his was a borrowed light, and the same source is still open to enlighten me."

Therefore, I have chosen this title because of my tendency to revere such great men and women in history. It is a constant reminder to us all that their light is only borrowed and that the true source of light is Jesus Christ. It is also an encouragement; whenever I read of the vibrant relationship such men had with our God I can remember that the same Jesus is readily available to me! It is my prayer that the purpose of this blog (moreover my life) might always be to draw near unto God and enjoy this Great Light!